Friday, June 21, 2013

Super Heroes Attacking Polar Bears #4: Wolverine

Our recent post featuring the Punisher socking a polar bear in the jaw got us thinking: How many more super heroes have run afoul of the world's biggest species of bear, and what could possibly inspire them to attack an animal that's been listed as a vulnerable species––likely to become endangered––by the International Union for Conservation of Nature?

As you'll see, some don't understand the dire situation that polar bears face, some want to test their mettle against the largest land carnivore in the world, and some just want to get their hands on a warm pelt.

Today's entry: Wolverine

Let's get this out of the way up front: Wolverine doesn't hate polar bears. He's a Canadian, remember. He appreciates all the fauna of the the great white north, including but not limited to mountain beavers, hoary marmots, long-tailed voles and Cascade golden-mantled ground squirrels. And, of course, polar bears.

But Wolverine is also a survivalist. And if the Blackbird breaks down in the Arctic Circle, he's not just going to let himself freeze to death while waiting for one of the X-Men who can fly (i.e. any of the other X-Men) to find time in their schedule to come pick him up. No, he's gonna leave a trail of dead beer cans on his way to the nearest igloo city, and if he has to murder a polar bear and wrap it around himself to stay warm, then by god, that's what he's gonna do

Because Wolverine is the best there is at what he does. And what he does isn't very nice, environmentally speaking.

1 comment:

  1. What annoys me most about this is that Wolverine is suppose to be an atheist.

    I didn't name myself after him because of the claws, metal bones, or mutant healing factor.