Thursday, January 23, 2014

The Worst Wrestlers Ever: Porkchop Cash

Call them ham 'n eggers, call them jobbers, or call them "wimpy guys," like we did when we were kids. Just don't call them winners.

The world of '80s and '90s pro wrestling was filled with matches in which accomplished superstars would pound the crap out of losers. In The Worst Wrestlers Ever, we shine the spotlight on the grapplers who just plain weren't any good.

Today's honoree: Porkchop Cash.


History books say little about the man known only as Porkchop Cash. Where did he come from? Who is he the boss of? And is his name a reference to his facial hair or his favorite food?

In his only televised WWF appearance, Cash had the dubious honor of facing off with newly crowned Intercontinental Champion The Ultimate Warrior. It was a great opportunity, but the match quickly turned sour for Cash. After trying to strike the Warrior's rock hard abs a couple of times to no effect, Cash made the cardinal mistake of looking away before giving it one last shot. The Warrior illegally moved the belt over the targeted area, Cash hurt his hand by punching it, and that was all she wrote.


Imagine how different history might have been if the Warrior hadn't cheated at the start of that bout. Cash wins the IC title. Goes on to face Hulk Hogan at Wrestlemania 6. Unifies the titles. Begins the reign of Porkamania.

Sorry for the watermark. But if you could watermark this yourself, you know you would.

Or maybe he would have lost anyway. The world will never know.

2 comments:

  1. Your basing this thing on one Match porkchop cash Was way better than that one match do your homework before you label a man's career as the worst ever wtf

    ReplyDelete
  2. Your basing this thing on one Match porkchop cash Was way better than that one match do your homework before you label a man's career as the worst ever wtf

    ReplyDelete