Top 5 Nintendo Power Covers: #3: Castlevania II

Last month, gamers everywhere were saddened by Ars Technica's report that Nintendo was ceasing publication of the venerable Nintendo Power magazine after more than 20 years of hard-hitting, unbiased Nintendo coverage.

Sure, the journalism industry is hurting, but this was still a shock. Now where will gamers go for Classified Information? Where will we see the further adventures of Nestor? And how will we live without the monthly list of the favorite 20 games of Nintendo retailers?? These questions may forever remain unanswered.

In the meantime, let's look back at the best Nintendo Power covers of all time; the ones that got you so excited about video games that you checked your mailbox every day when you were a kid.

This cover combines the splendor of a second-rate Trojan warrior costume from Party City with the creepiness of a real skull with the stellar photoshop skills needed to make Dracula's severed head's eyes glow. The result is the most spooktacular cover in Nintendo Power history.

The glory of this cover rests in its gory details: The ACE bandages wrapped around Simon Belmont's shins. The fog machine mist covering only his feet, as though it's a Rob Liefeld drawing. The red undershirt that has us convinced the model portraying Simon is on his meal break from the local Target. What a horrible night to have to pose for a Nintendo Power cover.

Look closely and you'll even see the five body parts you have to collect in order to beat Castlevania II. They're right there on his velour cape. PS. Did you know that a ring counts as a body part?

Also: "More Super Mario 2"! This issue of Nintendo Power is intended for those who can't get enough Super Mario 2. All four of you.

Top 5 Nintendo Power Covers: #4: WWF Super Wrestlemania

Last month, gamers everywhere were saddened by Ars Technica's report that Nintendo was ceasing publication of the venerable Nintendo Power magazine after more than 20 years of hard-hitting, unbiased Nintendo coverage.

Sure, the journalism industry is hurting, but this was still a shock. Now where will gamers go for Classified Information? Where will we see the further adventures of Nestor? And how will we live without the monthly list of the favorite 20 games of Nintendo retailers?? These questions may forever remain unanswered.

In the meantime, let's look back at the best Nintendo Power covers of all time; the ones that got you so excited about video games that you checked your mailbox every day when you were a kid.

Hulkamania faced one of its toughest tests in the spring of 1990, when the Canadian Earthquake (pictured) ambushed Hulk Hogan while he was being interviewed on the Brother Love show and sat on his chest, putting him in the hospital and putting his career in jeopardy. Thanks to the countless letters of support sent to him by little Hulkamaniacs the world over, Hogan was able to recover in time to challenge Earthquake to a grudge match at Summerslam '90.

This Nintendo Power cover commemorates how, using the power of a Super Nintendo controller, Hogan was able to overcome his husky opponent and restore the natural balance of U.S.-Canadian foreign relations.

Please note that Hulk's atomic legdrop is not a move that can actually be performed in WWF Super Wrestlemania.

Also: CD ROM TECH UPDATE! Nintendo Power's investigative journalists ripped the lid off the space-age technology known as "CD ROM." Too bad no Nintendo console has ever incorporated it.

What's Andre the Giant Doing in the 1970s? #4

Meeting Frankenstein!

Things I Learned While Playing... RUSH 'N ATTACK!

Who says that video games aren't educational? This video series seeks to prove that valuable knowledge can be gained from every game. So sit back and prepare to enter the 8-Bit University!

Top 5 Nintendo Power Covers: #5: Super Mario Bros. 2

Last month, gamers everywhere were saddened by Ars Technica's report that Nintendo was ceasing publication of the venerable Nintendo Power magazine after more than 20 years of hard-hitting, unbiased Nintendo coverage.

Sure, the journalism industry is hurting, but this was still a shock. Now where will gamers go for Classified Information? Where will we see the further adventures of Nestor? And how will we live without the monthly list of the favorite 20 games of Nintendo retailers?? These questions may forever remain unanswered.

In the meantime, let's look back at the best Nintendo Power covers of all time; the ones that got you so excited about video games that you checked your mailbox every day when you were a kid.

The first-ever Nintendo Power cover, from 1988, is still one of the best. This was the era before concept art, meaning that magazine publishers had to get a little more creative with the visuals for their covers. In this case: clay figurines!

If you didn't know any better, you'd think Mario was the villain here, what with his demonic, curling mustache, his wicked grin, his pallid demeanor, and the unhinged look in his eyes. Meanwhile, Wart looks like he just woke up from a nap and is mildly irritated that somebody raided his carrot patch.

Badass Box Art of the Week: M.U.L.E.

Sometimes video game box art is so completely badass that it demands you purchase the game even though you may have never heard of the title or even play video games at all! Only these boxes have earned the right to be honored with the title of Badass Box Art of the Week!

If this box could talk it would say, "Hey aliens, I brought two things to this crap stink planet of yours: my space horse Gary and a fist packed full of Freedom! Now bow down before me while my hair blows majestically in the cosmic wind."

Only the most badass astronaut of all time leaves his space craft wearing his astro suit buttoned halfway down, and this guy isn't going to let some damn helmet get in the way of his flowing 1970s Chuck Norris hair.

The name of this game is an acronym, and what it might stand for is a complete mystery. I for one firmly believe that it stands for Moustache Users Love Explosions.

-Dusty

Murder She Wrote Recaps: S1E4: It's a Dog's Life

A nonsensical script, incomprehensible acting, and completely indecipherable editing combine to leave this episode unable to be codified by the human brain in any logical way. It made so little sense that I legitimately wondered if my house had a carbon monoxide leak.

It didn't.

Are You Serious?!?! Episode One: Ninja Gaiden

Video games are full of moments that make you throw your hands in the air and scream "Are You Serious?!?!" This series of videos highlights some of those rage-inducing levels that made you consider pouring bleach into your NES.

Anybody that has spent hours playing Ninja Gaiden knows that this game is full of extremely annoying platforming moments. This is, after all, the only game that makes you fight a hawk, a cheetah, an out-of-work prizefighter, a pirate, a knife-throwing 50s greaser, and a hatchet-wielding psychopath all at once! These enemies are also set to re-spawn at a relentless rate!